Logo

What happens when your partner doesn't see the value in you and continuously hurts you by searching for something in others knowing it hurts you?

11.06.2025 00:08

What happens when your partner doesn't see the value in you and continuously hurts you by searching for something in others knowing it hurts you?

I would ask myself why I consider it worth my time to be with someone who does not find me valuable. Identifying this answer will over time protect me from finding myself in this same predicament over and over.

If my “partner” didn’t see value in me and hurt me searching for something in others, I would remind myself that I cannot change people, “make them see” or “make them love me”.

I would realize that it’s not my partner who is hurting me. I am hurting myself, by agreeing to stay with someone who is looking for something he is not finding in me.

How is it, in the USA, a country with 334 million people, the choice of President comes down to two aged men, one of whom is a liar as well as a criminal, one who appears to be on his way to dementia. Surely a democratic country can put up better?

There is another scenario:

“Making someone love me” is the most painful, most fruitless of efforts, because love cannot be manufactured in this way.

I believe this non-love is the best I can do and spend all my time and energy attempting to preserve the very thing that causes me pain.

Why cant I sleep even tho I am sleepy? I am not anxious or worried but my body just doesn't want to. I've been awake for almost 2 days and feel sleepy but I cant sleep. My doctor said its anxiety related but its not. Is this normal?

I would leave this partner to grant him full freedom to go find whatever he is looking for and spend the time and energy that I put into that relationship getting to know myself. What I would find is someone flawed and worthy of love.

I would work hard at only being interested in people who are equally interested in me.

In one scenario, I stay with this partner, wonder why he doesn’t love me, and begin living in a world of my creation where I believe that, unfortunately, I am not worth loving.

Dave Chappelle and Mo Amer on Politics and Comedy, SNL Monologues - Variety

What happens?